Today is Day #4 of the …blah blah blah, you know what I’m talking about. I’m supposed to analyze a top blog in my niche. My niche? I don’t have no stinkin’ niche! I’ve been searching around for some thirty-something blogs, and I’m finding that I don’t have a lot in common with a lot of the writers – I don’t own a home, I’m not a Mommy, etc. Hell, I’m not even married yet. Though I was engaged once, many many moons ago. But that’s another story for another post.
Where are the blogs for the thirty-somethings who fail at life? I can’t be the ONLY one, can I?
So I’ve looked at some twenty-something blogs, and perhaps I have a little bit more in common with some of them. I think I’ll stop searching there, because really, if I have even MORE in common with teenaged Miley Montana fans, then I’ve got PROBLEMS.
I’ve always been a late bloomer. When I blogged back in the day, in my twenty-something years, I was very emo. I wrote heart-on-my-sleeve posts, and was very open about my various issues – depression and other emotional/mental problems, relationships, etc. I even wrote angsty poetry. And people flocked to it. I had a lot of regular readers, was top ranked on a site that, sadly, no longer exists (Clix/diarist.net).
But I’m just not in that place anymore. Oh, I’ve still got issues and problems, but for the most part, I’m happy. I have a wonderful boyfriend, my job is good, my relationship with my family is better than it has been in a while…all that good stuff. With that happiness, though, comes the loss of a muse, it seems.
And it’s damn frustrating.
I don’t write for profit – I just write to get it out. I write to connect with people. So far, I’m feeling like my latest attempt to do this is an epic fail. Granted, I’ve only had this new blog for what, a week? But I’ve had my twitter for a few years, and started really getting back into it a few months ago. The 31DBBB has given me a bunch of new followers, but do they really give a crap about what I’m tweeting? I haven’t followed many of them back, because a lot of them appear to be social media/blog marketing gurus who probably just want me to pay them to help increase my SEO, whatever that is, or design a layout for my page, or become my life coach because, you know, I’M A THIRTY-SOMETHING WHO FAILS AT LIFE. So, I’m picky about my refollowing. No offense, folks. 🙂
What I want is for people to see me and think that maybe I’m someone worth listening to (reading, whatever). I want people to say, “Wow, Mer, you’re a chubby, weird, thirty-something with more issues than you can shake a stick at. You’re struggling to get by, but you seem nice. You’re funny sometimes. You like Coors Light and karaoke. I think I want to keep you.”
Do I sound needy or WHAT? Well, maybe that’s because I am. I’ve been struggling for acceptance and love since pretty much the womb.
All in good time, I suppose. Rome wasn’t built in a day, as the saying goes. And neither will my massive blogging empire, I guess.
Meanwhile, tonight I’ll be indulging in two of the things that I love – Coors Light and karaoke.
I'd rather be elsewhere, most likely 
Hey don’t feel bad about not finding your niche. I’m struggling with it too. And don’t feel bad about relating more with people younger than you- at least you’re not reading a retiree’s blog (do they have blogs?) about their good times in the nursing home and thinking to yourself, “Hmm that sounds like me!” To be honest, I’ve felt weird lately because I live in a small town and there are maybe three other 20-somethings here. So all my friends are teenagers and the middle-aged parents of those teenagers. It’s not so bad, but when I come online there are others out here in Internetland who can relate to me, but I just haven’t found them yet. I’m sure there are people who can relate to your blog, they just haven’t found it yet. Heck, I relate and I don’t really fit your criteria.
And I have to throw in that I feel the same way about Twitter. I hate that rule that if I don’t follow somebody back, they’ll unfollow me. What is this, Kindergarten? What if I don’t *care* about their tweets of great bikini pictures of the week?
Wow I just left a really weird rambling comment. I apologize for that… It’s late. I need sleep. I’m going to go do that now. Haha, good night. Good luck.
No need to apologize for rambly comments – I love them! And you make a lot of good points…thanks for keeping me encouraged.
Coors Light and Karaoke rock, that’s a sweet niche to have! Who’s to say you can’t be the only one in your niche, there’s alot to be said for individuality. You also have a niche in the category of “honesty”, it’s not as big a niche in the blogosphere as one would hope.
I’m hereby staking my niche as Jack Daniels and Rockband.
Thanks for all the compliments! I feel all warm and fuzzy now!
And a little bit hungover, to be quite honest. Too many Coors Lights. 😉
Have a great weekend!
Your post reminds me of my daughter, she’s 28, not married, no kids, doesn’t own a house. From someone a little older and hopefully wiser, you are succeeding at YOUR life! You could have “settled” and gotten married, had kids by now & would probably have a house, but you are a strong enough woman that you’re true to your gut.
Remember when you moved to Ca? At the time, I was totally shocked that you were going to move so far away from home & I honestly didn’t think you’d stay here, but you did. That in itself is a huge accomplishment.
If I can give you 1 piece of advice, and obviously I’m going to do that, stop trying to follow what you consider the “social norms.” 50% of the married people will end up divorced, most will be single parents, they’ll be stuck in jobs they hate cuz they have a mortgage to pay. You’re FREE! The world is your oyster… literally.
You’ve got to realize what you do have & really cherish it, because these are some of the best years of your life. I can guarantee you when you are 50 you’re going to look back @ this time in your life & realize how good it was. The whole thing is to realize that NOW.
Oh, and you can sing?? When I sing my pig literally walks out of the room… I am not kidding.
Thank you so much Jane! Honestly, I’ve – for the most part – come to terms with not being on par where the “social norms” are concerned. I’m far behind most of my good friends from high school/college. Coming to California gave me a new perspective, because all of a sudden, I knew people from all walks of life – not just the East Coast bubble I was used to.
It’s only now that I’ve been reading blogs in my industry (HR/Recruiting) that I get so pissed off. I read them so that I can learn more about the industry in which I work, not to hear about how someone made a gazillion dollars while following their entrepreneurial spirit. And while spouting off advice that just isn’t practical for most of us struggling in the recession.
I could rant about that shit all day…*sigh*
Can we be a niche of self-deprecating cheap beer lovers?
Why yes, yes we can. 🙂