Bingey McBingerson

I just keep binging. I’ve gained 5 pounds this week. I’m sad.  I hate being around people – or dread it – or just feel so damn uncomfortable.  But on the other hand, I hate being lonely.  All these conflicting feelings just cause me to eat and eat and eat.  Gross.  Not eating because I’m hungry, I’m eating because I somehow am seeking comfort from it. Or something.  I have no idea.  I have got to pull myself together.  This is absolutely disgusting.  I’m very tempted to purge, but I think that it would be very painful due to the combination of what I’ve eaten.

I feel so ill-at-ease.  And ill in the stomach, to be honest.  It’s so embarrassing. I wish I was better at restricting.  These days, I’m falling…nay, CAREENING, off of the Weight Watchers wagon.  I really need to get control back, regain focus, and get my ass back to the gym and to walking around the neighborhood.  These days, it’s been too hot/humid to do much of anything.  Just sitting makes me sweat. EW.

So now I’m just this overstuffed, bloated blob of sadness, anxiety, and shame.

And so it goes.


About meredithelaine

forty-something. jersey girl in texas via california.
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2 Responses to Bingey McBingerson

  1. I love you, babe! You’ll pull out of it!

  2. Sara Shank says:

    I am the same way honey. Emotional binging is such a super bitch the way it makes you feel so bad about yourself. Just keep pushing on through!

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