You know I’m trying…

I love this song. It sounds like an mid-1980s dance/pop tune.  Like “Baby Love” by Regina or something.

Damn right.

Not terribly much to report these days.  I got my meds adjusted (again).  So far, so good.  I swear, one of these days, I’m just going to be a zombie from all the meds.  Of course, this week I’ve been PMSing hardcore, so who knows if the drugs have been keeping me on an even keel, or if it’s the chocolate I’ve been inhaling these days.  I’ve been slacking on Weight Watchers over the past month or 2, and as a result, I’ve gained back 13 pounds as of this morning. THIR-MUTHA-FUCKING-TEEN.  From the lowest weight I reached on WW so far.  But more like about 7 pounds from my major plateau point.

The fact that I’m most likely starting the holiday season even FURTHER behind…kills me.  So, I’m going into panic mode.  More fiber pills, more senna tea.  My daily point target is 26…today I maxed out at 22.  Hopefully I’ll get my ass back to the gym tomorrow morning (I’m so tired, and it’s so cold!), and take some walks this weekend.

I don’t want my family to see me and think that I’ve made NO progress since they last saw me (the wedding, 2011).

This week has been stressful at work.  Conference calls about workers comp and safety procedures.  Preparing for early payroll due to Thanksgiving. I filled 2 job orders, so that’s cool.  I’m working on about 4 or 5 others, though.  Plus doing all that I usually do.  So I’m tired. Weary.  I just want everything to be over and done with.  I want Tuesday morning to come, I want to stuff the envelopes, mail the paychecks and get out the door.  Go home, finish packing, and then chain smoke and drink bloody marys until I need to get on the plane.

As much as I hate flying, I’m so excited to see my family.  And my Becca. Becca is my oldest friend (from HIGH SCHOOL OMG) that I have actually stayed in touch with and stayed close with.  I can’t wait to cook Green Bean Casserole, hang out with my sister, drink Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and eat real pizza, bagels and Chinese food.  And go Black Friday shopping.  I’m literally bringing 1 pair of pants and 2 shirts to NJ for the 3.5 day trip.  Gotta save room in the suitcase(s) for all the goodies I’m going to bring home!  Mom and I are going to steal Dad’s credit card and DO WORK.

It’s 730pm, and the evenings are starting to get chilly in San Diego.  Go figure, it happens.   I’m so exhausted, that I’m already bundled up in my PJs, in bed, in the dark, watching a rerun of Man vs Food as I write this.  And zoning out.  It’s probably time for bed.  You know, at 745pm.

About meredithelaine

forty-something. jersey girl in texas via california.
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