Tag Archives: trigger warning

Discouraged

I did it again.  I tried on jeans that are sitting in my drawer.  And of COURSE they don’t fit, of course I’m getting fatter.  I’m going absolutely batshit crazy over this. I had a mini-binge.  I tried to implement … Continue reading

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I choose defeat; I walk away – and leave this place the same today…

  Go figure. Last post I made was lamenting about my weight, self-loathing, etc. Several months later, here I am, embarking on my 3rd week of treatment.  I’m in intensive outpatient therapy for my eating disorder.  Binge Eating Disorder (BED).  Compulsive/Emotional … Continue reading

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Grumble, grumble, chomp, chomp.

I’m sleeping more these days.  Not when I should (nighttime), but naps. I’d rather flop down on the couch and nap than face the world.  I’m gaining weight so rapidly.  I can’t really be bothered to do my hair.  I’m … Continue reading

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Baby steps…

I haven’t done a lot of writing lately.  I haven’t done a lot of anything lately.  Except eating.  I’m up 6 pounds in a month. To my credit, I’ve done a lot more walking, jogging, and general work-out type things. … Continue reading

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DAMMIT

I’d MUCH rather revert to my anorexic ways or hell, even my bulimic ways, than the binge-fest hell I’m in now. I can’t escape it. I wish I knew how. 

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Distraught

The sad is engulfing me. I’m stressed out and overworked and everything has me set on edge.  I’ve been teetering on the edge of a cold for what seems like forever now.  I want to sleep.  I don’t want to … Continue reading

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You know I’m trying…

I love this song. It sounds like an mid-1980s dance/pop tune.  Like “Baby Love” by Regina or something. Damn right. Not terribly much to report these days.  I got my meds adjusted (again).  So far, so good.  I swear, one … Continue reading

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Meh.

I hate being fat and hideous and having no self control.  I’m gaining, gaining, gaining. Nothing fits (in the WRONG way).  I’ve eaten so much and my stomach is STILL growling. WTF is wrong with me? I wish I could … Continue reading

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Bingey McBingerson

I just keep binging. I’ve gained 5 pounds this week. I’m sad.  I hate being around people – or dread it – or just feel so damn uncomfortable.  But on the other hand, I hate being lonely.  All these conflicting … Continue reading

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Tosh point blah, whatever.

Honestly, I could not give a fuck about this Tosh/Rape thing.  All though, it’s got me all riled up, so I guess I do care.  The world is in a huge kerfuffle about it (god, I’ve been dying to use … Continue reading

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